A Likely Story!

Rocket's Red Glare

A surprisingly true story...

Rocket's red glare is what he sought

So off to the store he went and bought

Bottle rockets that were sold to him

"Stuff to blow up" he thought with a grin.

But where to shoot them to get the most

Bang for his buck screw the cost

He scratched his head and thought real hard 

Bingo, I think I'll try the back yard

Rocket #1 went off with a bang

The colors were awesome, the rocket sang

But bothersome neighbors he didn't want

Should he reconsider his rockety thoughts?

The front yard he knew had tons of appeal

He'd do it right quick so no one would squeal

#2 went airborne, oh shit, too loud

Inside to regroup, away from the crowd.

One rocket was left, he needed to send it

But where would that be? And how would he end it?

He didn't know how or what or where to

So he retreated upstairs to ponder in his loo.

Out the window?  No, then it'd be too loud

He pondered some more

And then he looked down

Into the sink

Which made him think

WATER..that might muffle the sound?

He mind careened ideas spewed forth

Minimize the danger, corral the force

Try this idea, hey, it might work

If not, who cares, I'll end up the jerk

He grabbed the rocket, lifted the lid

Of the toilet seat and stuck the thing in

Yeah, bottle rocket stuck in the pot

You really think I'd make this stuff up?

He lit the tail then stood back and waited

Before long the water evacuated

Out of the toilet and on the ceiling

The floors, the wall, his mind was reeling

The toilet gurgled then went quiet

Then started the noises that made his heart quit

Deep in the base of the toilet thingy

"What have I done' he started thinking

When all was said and done, dear readers

A useless toilet was his for keepers

It could have been much worse he knew

The house coulda been blown to Timbuktu

But it wasn't and all he had to show for it

Was a toilet where you could not take a shit

No lives were lost & for this he was grateful

And when he told his mom, she wasn't hateful

He needed to own it and this he did

And he swears he'll never again open the lid

To the toilet and deposit harmful explosives

Lessons learned he freely admits

Don't mess with where you pee and shit.

FINALLY!!

Office cleaned with pix to prove it!

Yeah, I still have some shredding to do, but at least I can walk into my office without wanting to turn around and walk right back out.

By the way, the desk is outta here. Looking for a good home and the price is right....FREE!

Hit me up for details and dimensions.

Feels really good to have this crossed off my to-do list!

Day Off

* Sun is out!

* Got to sleep late!

* Whittled down my in-box from 49 to ZERO :-)

* Thankful that the snow has stopped

* Thankful AND grateful for all of you guys...my wonderful bloggy friends

Time to get out of bed and start my day now that it is 12 noon.

( I told you I got to sleep late!!)

I Still Hear His Voice

"You're a good 'taker-carer-ofer. You've taken wonderful care of me. And my family. And your family. And our dog. You just love to take care of me and everyone else. And that's why I stayed with you for the last 3 years. I didn't love you anymore, but I woulda been stupid to leave you...cause you did everything for me. You did it cause you loved me and you wanted to make me happy. You didn't want anything in return other than to make me happy. So I guess I have to finally be honest with you since you've always been honest with me. I don't love you anymore. I haven't for awhile. File the divorce papers tomorrow."

And that's how I knew my marriage was over. I picked up the necessary documents the next day and we filed 2 days later.

And a month later, Dec 7 2001, our marriage was declared over and I was single again.

Every year around this time, I remember the day he was finally honest with me.  And I remember the day our marriage ended

I still hear his voice like he said it yesterday. And I always wonder as I go thru my life, helping out family and friends and co-workers and plain old strangers, am I doing it again? Am I going overboard on the being nice and kind and helpful?  Cause I really truly like being that way. I LOVE LOVE LOVE to help out...whoever...whenever...for whatever reason. When I was in 3rd grade, my dad asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. And I said that I wanted to help people. Consistancy, right?

Honestly, it's how I like to be. I'm no Mother Teresa; far from it. I never expect anything back other than to know I made someone's life a little easier or happier or cheerier. Yet, when it comes to this time of the year, I tend to second guess myself. To pull back just a little and review where I am and the type of person I am.  Just this week I thought...for the very first time...maybe...just maybe...it was him?  Maybe it's ok to be giving and loving and making someone else the center of your life and universe cause it comes from within...I wasn't really doing it for him...I was doing it for me cause I WANTED to do it for him?

I'm not in a relationship now...haven't been in one for awhile. It doesn't really bother me either. Every now and then I will say' ok, yeah...I'm ready to move forward...then 5 minutes later I change my mind and think 'Why bother'?  It's easier this way. Easier to be friends and buddies and not go down the relationship road".

It gets easier every year, this whole D-Day anniversary thing. It'd be nice to not remember it each year and not to get all retrospectivey & analytically about it. But I do. 

And when all is said and done, I would do it all over again, yes I would.

I would move heaven and earth to make that one special person feel as special as possible. To give everything and then some and not expect anything in return.

It's me. That's how I am and how I roll. 

If there is a next time around, I hope it would turn out differently.

Keepin' It Real

For the most part, I am a neat-and-clean-aholic. Everything just right and in the right place. Just last week my dear buddy HDW said something to the effect of ' You always say you have a messy house but I just don't think you do'.

Very sweet of her and clearly she needs to visit more often. So in the interest of keepin' it real, here's several pix of my 'former' home office.

My last working day at CCTC was Oct 29th. As soon as I sent my last im to my Team Leader at 3:30 MDT (Denver to the Mothership, over and out) I logged off, unplugged...and dashed out of the office to get ready for J#2 (which is now J#1).  The next day, I tore apart my office at the crack of dawn since I had to get all my office equipment FEDEX'd back to the Mothership. Other than one other time when I was looking for a receipt, that was the last time I was in my office. 

Oh sure, I'd think about it every other day or so...saying to myself that I 'really need to get in there and clean up the mess'...but other chores or laziness or procrastination got in the way and here is how my office has looked since Oct 29th.

Disclaimer...while this may be nothing to you, it is horrendously messy to me. And I can't believe I am even showing it to you, but since transparency is the new black, why not?

Lest you think the rest of my house looks equally messy, I assure you it does not. Here is my guest room. Just waiting for a guest to come for a visit!

I figured if I posted my office pictures, I would get inspired to clean that mess up! Whatever it takes to motivate, right?

I'll keep you posted, with 'after' pix as well.

Who knows? Maybe I'll run right upstairs and clean it now!!

:-)

Love & Hate

A long time ago, my buddy Tom suggested I should write a post '100 Things About Kath'.

So I'm sitting here all cozy and warm in front of the fireplace...when I shoulda been at Team Trivia night. What can I say, it's snowy and icy and cold outside and I am a sucky wimp driver in ice and snow, so there you have it.

Rather than write 100 things about me...decided to break it down to 50 things I love and 50 things I hate.

Ready?

50 Things I LOVE :

1. Killer CO sunsets
2. Sleeping late 
3. My electric blanket 
4. 1000 threadcount Italian sheets 
5. The smell/feel of clean laundry fresh from the dryer 
6. Kind people 
7. People that smell good 
8. Puppybreath 
9. And of course, puppies too! 
10. When I listen to my gut feeling  
11. When my friends 'get me' 
12. White twinkly sparkly lights 
13. Calls or texts from friends just because 
14. Honesty 
15. Found money 
16. Genuine smiles 
17. Genuine people with genuine smiles 
18. Vodka...with plenty of limes 
19. My coworkers and their collective sense of humor
20. Efficiency 
21. Neatness 
22. Order 
23. Uncluttered surroundings 
24. Good hair days 
25. Getting carded ( it last happened 2 weeks ago! Told her she was too kind and needs glasses)
26. Hot dinners  
27. When good fortune happens to my friends and family 
28. Found $ 
29. NBA in person 
30. The perfect hug 
31.  The internet
32.  Paying my mortagage...cause it means I have a job and a house 
33. When friends come to visit 
34. Having a spotlessly clean house/truck/garage/everything 
35. Not slipping on ice. (Unfortunately, it doesn't happen all that much) 
36. Hot showers 
37. In-N-Out Burgers 
38. Hearing from my grade school boyfriend (HAWR!) 
39. Mini-Weiner Dogs 
40. Raspberry Vodka Tonics 
41. Alternative music 
42. Live concerts 
43. Anything Apple 
44. My Blog Buddies
45. Trusting my gut feeling 
46. BBQ
47. Vibrantly colored flowers 
48. Bacon
49. Green design homes 
50. That I had the guts to start over 7 years ago this weekend.  

  
  50 Things I HATE :

1. Cigarette smoke
2. Drug abuse
3. Intolerance 
4. Mean people. And yes, they DO suck
5. Religious fundamentalists that want to turn their beliefs into law 
6. PC's 
7. Clutter 
8. Slobs 
9. Whiny negative people 
10. Child abuse 
11. Animal abuse 
12. People who cheat the system 
13. Burnt popcorn 
14. Broken promises 
15. Hurricanes 
16. Puppy poop 
17. Rocks, Paper, Scissors game 
18. Microphone feedback 
19. Getting lost 
20. Letting my friends and family down 
21. Migraines 
22. ICEY ROADS 
23. Desparation 
24. Jack Johnson - his music gets on my last nerve 
25. High-pitched screeching noises 
26. Plane crashes 
27. Bugs 
28. Snakes 
29. Humidity 
30. Mosquitos 
31.  Welfare cheats  
32. Over consumption 
33. People who don't even attempt to recycyle 
34. Throwing out my back 
35. Procrastinating 
36. People who sing along to songs and get all the words wrong 
37. Grammatical errors 
38. Slobs (yeah...I know I already said this)
39. When the internet dies 
40. Forced gaiety 
41. Liars 
42. Burned out lightbulbs that are too high for me to change them 
43. Weeds 
44. Customers that say 'I have a quick question that will only take a minute' and then they take 20 minutes of your time
45. Fail Whale 
46. Papercuts 
47. Dental visits (unless it's for a cleaning) 
48. Knowing that sometimes I am my own worst enemy 
49. Trusting someone that I know I shouldn't be trusting 
50. When I don't listen to my gut feeling and wind up regretting it.   

So what's your list?

I'm tagging 5 CO bloggers, 4 out-of-state-er's, and anyone else that's dying to try this! 

Problem Solved!!

Just solved a problem that had been bothering me ever since I moved into my house almost 3 years ago.

I have a really comfy leather chair in my living room that I like to sit in every now and then. Sadly, the plug for my computer never quite reached from the wall to my laptop, so I'd always have to sit all contortiony and stuff.

Until tonite. When I decided to...wait for it...push the chair closer to the wall. Whoa. Genius at work, don't you concur?

Sometimes I truly amaze myself.